Tuesday, November 26, 2019

9 steps to the confident hire me handshake

9 steps to the confident hire me pfoteshake9 steps to the confident hire me handshakeA handshake is how we communicate our first impressions at work. Theyre how other people take our measure, and they tell others whether were confident or faking it. (Hello, sweaty hands).We often dont think about the handshake as a complex set of behavioral tasks, but Denise Dudley, clinical psychologist and author of Work It Get in, Get Noticed, Get Promoted, does and she has broken this critical task for career success into the smallest components anyone of us can do.Its tactile because Im going to be ticking you, Dudley told Ladders. Its visual because youre going to be looking at me and assessing my face and eye contact. And its also auditory because Im going to be saying my name toyou or at least saying the words, hi or hello. Its a bunch of information condensed down to just a few seconds of interaction. Its how we do a quick assessment of who the other person is.Here is the definitive general guide Dudley has studied on how you should handshake in the workplace in the United States1) StandNo matter whos who, older or younger, the best way to initiate a handshakeis to get on your feet and stand in front of the person, if your body is able, Dudley believes. It honors the person, its the polite thing to do. But more importantly, it puts you in the proper alignment to shake hands, she said.2) Square offYou then need to have your shoulders squared off to the person you want to shake hands with, so that you are facing them. When your shoulders are aligned, so are your sympathies.3) AimAimyour right hand towards their right hand and point your thumb towards their shoulder, so it keeps your palm open.As soon as the web of your skin anfluges theirs, you close your hand around theirs.4) SqueezeHeres the step where people trip up and make bad handshakes. People can wrongly performthe bone-crusher and squeeze too hard or they can imitate a dead fish andlimply let their hands be take n.A strong handshake, or a weak one, are leid coincidences. Instead, theyre reliable body-language signals that tell us what peoples intentions are.Bone-crushing handshakes are an aggressive action that happen when people want to dominate you or want to remind you that they are more important than you. Dead-fish handshakes can be equally as bad because they make you a non-participant, and create the impression that you have no personal agencyand that you dont want to be doing this. They also make the person whose hand youre shaking feel as if you dont take them seriously and dont want to commit to anything.The best, perfect, hire me handshake is to close yourhand around theirhand and squeeze firmlybut gently, Dudley said. She recommends being on the gentler side if you notice the person is wearing rings on his or her hand.5) Pump your elbowThe pump needs to be executed from the elbow, Dudley said. We dont do a pump, an upward and downward motion, from our wrist because that isjarrin g, and itlooks weird and it feels weird. And we dont want to do it from the shoulder. If you initiate a handshake from your shoulder, the see-saw actionwill yank people off of their feet, and you will come off as a domineering jerk. Instead, the shoulder should stay stable as the elbow moves.In the U.S., workers typically pump their hands three times on average, Dudley said, while in several Asian and South American cultures, the pumping hand can come with a slight bow.6) Make direct eye contactThis is a requirement. You must give people your undivided attention in this one moment. When we go for a handshake, we look directly in the eyes of the person were shaking hands with- and nowhere else. Its a rule that cant be broken, Dudley said. You dont look at the next person youre going to shake hands with, you dont look down, you look right in their eyes.In countries outside of the U.S., you may need to look down as a sign of respect, however. In Japan, infamously, too much eye contact can be read as a sign of aggression.7) Adopt a neutral or friendly facial expressionSome sort of pleasant facial expression is needed to turn agood handshake into a great one. Smiling is an easy accompaniment to get this across, but you should at least look pleasant, if you cant have a smile, Dudley said.This too has cultural implications smiles are rare in the U.K. and France when meeting someone for the first time, and in fact a big open smile there makes people think youre not that bright or youre easily fooled. Instead, keep an open, attentive, neutral face, which should work in nearly all countries.8) GreetingA handshake is not a silent ballet. While all of these unseen behaviors are happening in seconds, you have to keep in mind to say some sort of greeting or if its the first handshake, an introduction to who you are.There are advanced maneuvers like gently touching your other hand on top of your shaking hand as a sign of affection, but you should only do thisafter youve met someone.Then there are people who go too farpeople who take their left hand and clamp it over their right hand thats shaking yours are not your friend- they want to make you feel trapped.9) Keep in mind the power dynamics of reciprocal touchHeres a harsh truth about humanity outside of family or very close friends, we touch people more when we think we have more power than they do.If you look at who touches whom in the world, children get touched a lot more than adults, women get touched more than men, students get touched more than teachers, patients get touched more than doctors. So in other words, who touches whom is a function of who believes they have the power in the interaction, Dudley said. We dont want to ever touch people in a way thats non-reciprocal, where they dont feel free totouch us back.That means that when we touch other people, especially at work, we need to make sure its in a way that they feel comfortable touching us back.High-fives and fist bumps are creative h andshakes that are acceptable in the workplace because they can be reciprocated Theyre simply showing who my brothers and sisters and peeps are. Its a cultural bonding thing, Dudley said.Your supervisorpatting you on the back for a job well done, however, is a non-reciprocal touch. You cant pat him on the back too, after all. This interaction, though well-meaning, is non-reciprocal because theres no way you the employee can pat them back in this power dynamic. Whether or not your touch can be reciprocated isthe overarchingdistinction that should guide what is acceptable and not at work.Those rules should help you master the handshake that gets you the job. Go forth and practice.

Thursday, November 21, 2019

Why You Should Brag to Get Ahead at Work - The Muse

Why You Should Brag to Get Ahead at Work - The MuseWhy You Should Brag to Get Ahead at Work If you want to get ahead in your career, theres one thing you absolutely have to do brag. You see, youre the only part who really knows how much you do and how hard you work. For instance, when your colleagues charge the door at 5 PM, they dont know that you stay until 8 PM. When your boss is on the golf course, she doesnt know youre putting out fires at the office. A professional acquaintance of mine once explained that she often works evenings and weekends to tie up loose ends and make sure events go smoothly. In the middle of a performance evaluation, she realized her boss had no idea how much work she welches putting in after hours because he wasnt there- and she hadnt been telling him. She made a point of communicating her efforts more clearly and reaped the rewards in praise, pay, and promotions. It can be dangerous to your career to assume that the people around you are aware of your ha rd work and accomplishments. You have to promote yourself.I know- your parents taught you to be humble and that no one likes a blowhard. Theyre right. Boasting and bragging are obnoxious. But stay with me. To get ahead, you dont need to brag like a 10-year-old. You need to boast in a way that strikes the perfect balance between humility and confidence. Sound tricky? Well, it is- but with these tips, you can master the art of the professional brag. Offer More DetailsTo promote yourself effectively, you need to explain what youre doing without being obnoxious. So, for example, dont dominate a team meeting with a lengthy and detailed description of every single thing you did over the past week. However, dont pass up opportunities to discuss important accomplishments, either- simply use a well-thought out, succinct description. Say your boss asks for a project update during a meeting. An average answer might be, Its been a little hectic, but everything is coming along basically as plann ed and within our budget.A better, self-promotional- but still humble- answer could be, Ive been visiting the site regularly to ensure the project is progressing and to address any issues head-on. We did hit a snag a couple of weeks ago when we found out that some necessary materials were on backorder. It took some lengthy conversations at odd hours, but I was able to work with our contractor to identify a few other projects we could tackle while waiting on those materials. I also identified a new supplier who could provide the flooring, which was our most urgent need. Thats being installed as we speak. So, we are very close to our projected timeline and still on budget. See the difference? The first answer completely glosses over the odd hours and extra effort that kept the project from lagging behind- which your boss and team should absolutely be aware of.Document Your AccomplishmentsYou also need to be able to eloquently put your accomplishments in writing. Why? Many performance reviews include a self-evaluation portion, and whether or not youre actively looking for a new job, its a good idea to keep your LinkedIn profile and resume updated with recent achievements, too. Youll also want to be able to quickly reference documentation of your accomplishments when an opportunity for a raise or promotion comes up- so you can make a convincing case to your boss that youre the most deserving candidate.One of the biggest mistakes I see when people attempt to record their achievements is a failure to include enough detail. Yes, in writing, you should strive to be succinct. But if your descriptions are too brief, you arent doing yourself any favors.For example, maybe you list the following in your LinkedIn profile, under your job title of manager for Thetfords Office SupplyShift leaderHelped with trainingThese bullets dont tell your employer anything about what youve actually accomplished or what you are capable of. When you say you helped with training, does that me an you showed up to one sole training session and talked for 10 minutes? Or did you help design the curriculum and now present it to each new group of employees? A better description of the same location could includeSupervised 12 part-time associates, including managing schedules, leave requests, and performance evaluationsCollaborated with management to revamp new employee training, which contributed to a 10% reduction in turnoverWhen you fail to explain your accomplishments in detail, you leave your current (or potential) employer guessing- and that will never work out well when there are other employees or candidates who clearly spell out their qualifications. Tell the WorldOkay, maybe you dont need to brag to the entire world. But you do need to get comfortable talking about the work you do with people other than your direct supervisor. Remember, no one really knows what you do unless you tell him or her. Much of your success in the workplace depends on your relationships with your peers. But its not enough to simply be well liked your colleagues need to know that youre capable. Thats what opens the doors to new opportunities for collaboration- which can help you get noticed inside or outside of your company.Lets say a colleague says to you, Hey, I had a great time at the fundraising gala. You did a great job with it A typical humble response might be, Thanks I actually had a lot of help- Ill pass your compliment on to the team. A better way to promote yourself (while still being gracious) would be to say, Thanks Ill be sure to pass your praise along to the rest of the team. You know, I really had no idea how much behind-the-scenes work goes into booking a venue and band for such a large event. It really helped me learn a lot about managing timelines and professional contracts.Boom. You just dropped several key pieces of information Youre a quick learner when you come up against something new, you have valuable project and contract management skills, and youre a gracious person who passes praise along to her team. Now, your 20-second response has the potential to open the door to further conversation and opportunities. Being genuine, giving credit where its due, and sharing praise appropriately are important behaviors in the workplace. These behaviors will endear you to your colleagues and help you establish a good reputation. But its equally important to make sure you get your fair share of the credit and praise when you deserve it- because youre the only person who can truly and accurately promote yourself.Photo of handstand out courtesy of Shutterstock.

Deadline Extended for the Arthur L. Williston Medal

Deadline Extended for the Arthur L. Williston Medal Deadline Extended for the Arthur L. Williston Medal Deadline Extended for the Arthur L. Williston MedalMarch 10, 2107 The deadline to submit a paper to be considered for one of ASMEs prestigious literature awards, the ASME Arthur L. Williston Medal, has been extended to March 20 from the original closing date of March 1.The ASME Arthur L. Williston Medal, which was established in 1954, is presented annually to an engineering student or recent graduate for authoring the best paper in the area of civic service. The award competition is open to ASME student members as well as ASME members who received a baccalaureate degree no mora than two years prior to the submission deadline.The winner of the first prize will receive $1,000, a bronze medal, a certificate and a travel expense supplement to attend the award presentation at the ASME International Mechanical Engineering Congress and Exposition (IMECE). In addition, two runners-up will receive a second prize consisting of a $500 honorarium and certificate and a third prize consisting of $250 and a certificate, respectively.Nominations for the 2017 ASME Arthur L. Williston Medal should be e-mailed to Fran McKivor at mckivorfasme.org by 1159 p.m. Eastern Time on March 20. For more information on the Arthur L. Williston Medal, visit the awards web page on ASME.org. To learn more about ASME Honors and Awards, visit www.asme.org/about-asme/get-involved/honors-awards.